the anti-tract: the nuclear land-mine in the arsenal of the Kalimite
As we have already learned, the TRUE False Prophet of the Christians' favorite psychic snuff-fantasy, S'ain't John's Revelation, is Pope Jack Thomas Chick the First, called S't. Jack the Tripper. S't. Jack's main weapon is his collection of clever, cheap cartoon tracts, with eye-catching names and easily-accessible cartoons; a distinct improvement over the old-fashioned "Sword of the Lord" tracts, covered in densely-packed words, printed in fine print.
Before very long, the stirrings of Shiva began in all the fledgling Kalimite minds and we started working on ANTI-TRACTS: Tracts mocking Christianity and belittling Chick's twisted theology. Many used Chick's original works---and Chick SUED! Livid with righteous fury, Chick's lawyers threatened lawsuits and job-losses. But, praise Ganesh, the courts ruled in favor of what is called the "Fair Use" clause; which means that, so long as the re-printer isn't claiming the work as their own, nor selling copies without permission of the publisher, copying and altering works for satirical purposes is perfectly legal.
Suck it up, S't. Jack.
Here are some of the BEST Anti-tracts. We've laid them out so that anyone can simply print them out and staple them together. You can fold the pages (we recommend the classic "fan*" fold) for easy distributions in libraries, Bible bookstores, bathrooms, ATM's, etc.
*- The Fan Fold- Simply fold the papers neatly in half, then fold back each outer edge, even with the first fold.
The first and foremost of the Anti-Tract warriors has to be Psycho Dave. Dave went through total Hell from Chick publications, who threatened lawsuits and, finding out Dave's employer, threatened to have him fired. Dave went back and drew his own cartoons; no lawsuit possible for mere resemblance. All of Psycho Dave's wonderful Anti-tracts and Anti-Christian rants can be found at: http://www.weirdcrap.com/
One of our favorite Anti-Tracts is this send-up of Jack's infamous anti-evolution tract, "Big Daddy?"
Next is a classic, "Space Moose" with more excellent Moosery to be found at: http://www.cs.grin.edu/~wellons/comics/space-moose/all_inline.php
Then, there is the excellent Cthulhu tract which has been much distributed in college towns.
Interestingly enough, there have been a number of Chr*stian reactions to this particular tract, including marches on schools, massive, hysterical revival-meetings at fundy churches and the forced cancellation of Rock concerts, including White Zombie, Eric Clapton and Motley Crue.
This stuff works, people! Print 'em out, stamp them with your Covenstead's mailing address (or simply www.churchofkali,com)
and sneak them into the same places where you usually find Chick tracts. (i.e., everywhere you don't want them.) Bible book stores of the rightist Fundy Protestant types and libraries, particularly college libraries where theology is a major subject, are excellent targets. Just head for the Bible and religion sections, but don't forget to hit fiction, art and the magazine stands; and NEVER forget the bathrooms. If the library has computers that go online, simply sit down, call up the Church of Kali's website, bookmark it for them and leave peacefully. And don't forget to drop a couple anti-tracts by the keyboard as you're walking out.
Svasti, Shiva! Hail, Xenu! Hail, Satan!
GOOD HUNTING!
Finally, the very BEST, most sophisticated anti-tracts are the work of our strong sister organization The Luciferian Liberation Front. The following ant-tracts are totally by their efforts and are uncopyrighted, to be distributed freely. If you send them a 20.00$USD membership fee (which we recommend; we have one), they will send you the tracts laid out in templates, so that they can be easily photocopied and pasted up to look like real Jack Chick tracts. But we're a pack of lazy, zombiefied thieves and assassins and that's too much dang trouble. All of the title pages below link you directly to the LLF's cartoon. We recommend simple printing out the page AS IS. That's always worked okay for us.